This beautiful photograph is by Anne Simone.


I love you. I believe you.

You are not crazy; you are sane in a crazy world.

The women I love most in the world are grappling with their rage. Their rage is correct, justified, and healthy.

But most of my clients work in positions of power where to “go screechy,” as one client calls it, is the fastest way to lose their credibility and impede their own message and power.

So what do we do?

Be very very tender, and very very fierce.

This is a two-step process. One is private; one is public.


First, the private. Find the safest space you can create for yourself, whether that’s alone or in the company of trusted kindred spirits.




Smash a baseball bat into the couch.




Buy shoes.

Curl up in a ball.

Let yourself have your most intense feelings; let them course through you fully.

Don’t skip this step. It makes everything that comes next possible.

Then bring tenderness. Let it trickle into you.

Bring comfort to sorrow.

Respect to rage.

Witness to trauma.

Reassurance to fear.

Faith to despair.

Healing to hurt.

Rest to watchfulness.

Tenderness is what helps you become a cathedral big enough for all of it.

Breathe into yourself until you can breathe love and courage and faith into your own heart. This might take several hours. If you only have two minutes, breathe deeper and bring extra tenderness. Put your hand on your heart and say, I’ve got you sweetheart–you’re safe with me.


And then stand up, make a cup of tea, put on a power outfit, and walk back out into the world.

This is the public part. This is where you put on your mantle of dignity and power.

Stand tall. Breathe deeply. Plant your feet. Inhabit your space on this earth.

You can go out into the world as a brave and calm advocate for yourself and others. You can embody courage by simply showing up in your body. That’s courage.

You can say silently, HERE I AM. DO NOT MESS WITH ME. I AM A FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH. I STAND WITH MY SISTERS. Sometimes it echoes even more loudly when you say it without words.

You can be enraged and also be steady.

You can have big feelings and still be laser-focused.

You can burn with fire and hold your ground with absolute clarity.

You can be steady, focused, and clear…and not dilute your truth.

This is the time of the #PERSISTERHOOD.

I believe in you.

I believe in us.

much love,


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